Yeap, as the heading sez, rejections. Job hunting can be difficult because in times like these, I have to be brave and know that I will c...

In a time of REJECTIONS (career and uh, dating)


Yeap, as the heading sez, rejections.

Job hunting can be difficult because in times like these, I have to be brave and know that I will come to face rejections in many things that I apply for. The road is never smooth. How philosophical.

So, as you all know, I applied for AP and BBC internships.

Oh, it is never easy to take in.

I also applied for a position in Al Jazeera - I damn gungho lah, supposed to be Senior Producer position and at least a few years experience but ah wtheck since there's an opening.

So of course,

Yet another rejection.

Makes me think about the template each company uses to reject their candidates. "Thank you", "We appreciate"... oh cut to the chase and save us the agony hahahaha.

I applied to all of them knowing that competition stakes were high but I still wanted to give it a try. My motto is always to try, otherwise you'd just never know... Rejections are all part of the process I suppose if you're willing to put yourself out there and do the things you want to.

It's easy to give up and become bitter because the time invested to send out these applications - carving out a nice portfolio and impressive cover letter all in the hopes of standing out from the rest - will come to a nil with rejections. But I suppose, it was all worth the time and shot. It may be a little stupid but I think it is worth it!

Right now, I applied for an internship with a consultancy firm in guess where? Myanmar.

It's a bit crazy coz it's a business firm and I have zero experience with Business and they're looking for graduates with a biz, law, econs background but I somehow managed to get an interview with them.

And that interview, I just had it this morning. Now, I am supposed to write a 1,000 word essay on "The Pros & Cons of Greece exiting the Euro". It is due within the next 2 days.

I know, I know.. I wonder what in the world I'm getting myself into sometimes, but I really want to expand my skill sets. Right now, I feel like I only have communications skill sets and a lack of work experience.

Also, Myanmar. It's a SEA country that I love after 2 years of studying SEA History in JC and I foresee something amazing that will blossom in that country. It's expanding and I am excited to be part of this movement as it grows politically and economically. I mean seriously, I look up to Aung Suu Kyi, so to me, it'd be amazing to see the growth of Myanmar or I would rather call it, Burma.

But I'm kinda freakin out with the essay, well ok, not literally but this article that I have to write is pretty damn technical and the last time I touched anything that has to do with econs was in JC. 4 years ago and I really am starting from a clean slate here writing this article. What's expected of me is a critical analysis, and I'm trying to see how I can write impressively even with my lack of knowledge. Two days. That's all I have. I'm gonna have to do something to push my limits, if this is what I want.

And if I get it, it'll be a 4 months internship at Yangon starting in July. I'll do my best, just like everything else in life~~~

I'll update you guys if I do!!! And I suppose, my grad trip will be determined ; ) Southeast Asia backpacking woohoo!!!!!

And if I don't, then I will just have to deal with it~


Speaking about everything else in life, ugh I'm gonna talk about dating.

Yes, I've been out on dates the past few months this year.

And can I just say that I am... EXHAUSTED.

Oh my goodness, I think my energy for career applications is hella more fervent than dating ok. Man, dating's supposed to be fun but it's getting exhausting leh. Aiya I won't go into details about how I even landed myself into these dates but, the fact that I've to meet a guy whom I completely do not know at all and then having to make small talk that sometimes amount to nothing. Wow, I am e x h a u s t e d.

I must say, at the start, it was kinda fun. Meeting new people, the excitement, but wahlau tiring leh after a while, when you realise the chemistry isn't working at all.

And I realise I can't take dates with strangers anymore. Because... if nothing happens, they become short-term relationships after that few hours that you've taken to know the dude. I for one, cannot live with short-term relationships because they are sad and my heart cannot take it. I love humans and the people I meet so when I have come to know you even for a few hours, I grow to like you and wish to know you better. But when it comes to love, it's either yes or no and nothing comes out of it if a connection isn't there.

Sometimes I think I know why people no longer want to be in love or fall in love and want to cocoon their hearts forever.

It's because people get hurt.

I get hurt because I feel sad when I can't emotionally connect with someone deeper and I have to let go of someone just because we don't match.

A lot of the times, I wonder why my gut is telling me: Honey, this isn't working out. Then I'd question myself if I even know what I'm looking for, or do I have too high expectations, or am I too impatient or... wow, there's just so much things to think about.

Then inevitably, I'd wonder if I have an inherent flaw in my personality.

I'd never think this way before but recently, after all the dates that I've been on, I'd just wonder... wow, what is going wrong man. Why isn't any of them moving on. I always thought that I just can't click with the other person. But I make sure not to rule out one thing, which is myself. It is hard to sometimes think that you could be the problem. Awareness is essential and well, I will need to see through it if indeed it is true.

But I don't think it is me leh!? Hahahahaha. If cannot click.. means cannot click right alamak.

I am a firm believer of being yourself and well, if two people don't understand one another or the other doesn't like you as you are, then it really isn't meant to be.

And sometimes, people question themselves and whether they're normal or they're doing things right for someone to like them. I have always believed that no one should act differently just to impress another person.

The fact is, if it doesn't work out. It just doesn't. It could be that personalities don't fit, beliefs aren't aligned, chemistry isn't there.

That's why it sucks.

Love is cruel. But I have come to understand that we're all individuals and we seek different things so it's never because you're built a certain way and the fact that you can't find someone, doesn't mean that there's something innately wrong with you. It's just that.. you haven't found someone who complements you.

I am early into this dating game. I am still a virgin at this and as much as it's confusing me and making me sick I guess I just gotta keep at it. I tell myself to always keep my mind in check. My heart can rule my mind once in a while, but the two must always act as a team and keep Tan Si Hui sane along the way~

For now, singlehood is the way to go. There isn't much choice to it, is there HAHAHA.

I will have to trust in divine timing. I'm not gonna cage my heart forever duh. I'd sign myself up at the nun monastery if that's the case.

Rejections, rejections, tough. But all necessary in life. I will try my best to face them all, positively~

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