It's 4am and I've work later but... I can't fall asleep, which is strange considering how tired I was in the day. I'm feeling contemplative so I guess I'll leave my thoughts here while they're still fresh on my mind.

Friends who know me, have known that ever since I became a reporter, my goal was to cover the elections at least once in my life. It's like a career milestone. But when GE2020 finally came around, guess what? I was exhausted. I was exhausted already from covering COVID-19 news. You know how they say it's a marathon and not a sprint? To be honest, this entire year so far has felt like a sprint, after a sprint, after another sprint. There was hardly ever time to catch my breath. While the circuit breaker period gave a slight respite to the craziness, it was still quite tiring reporting from home for a month, having to create my own makeshift reporting space and being my own cameraman and soundman, as well as trying to survive communicating with my editors solely through calls and whatsapp. It was trying and fun at the same time, it felt like the latter only when I started getting used to wfh.

So when GE2020 came around, it really felt surreal but at the same time I was asking myself "yoooo, the time is finally here. where's your energy???" It was definitely an experience going on the walkabouts, speaking to ministers, reading all the drama online, but I wasn't really feeling the reporting excitement somehow. It was either a) all my energy was sapped due to covid news overload or b) this year's election lacked the spirit of elections because everyone was staying at home. Well, it could even be both a) and b). This election is really really different from past elections, even my bosses were confused and lost when it came to planning logistics for Polling Day. There were no assembly centres, no physical points for people to gather and cheer so they didn't know where to delegate manpower and resources - it was so so different for everyone.

Looking on the bright side though, I was quite lucky to have experienced it eh?

Everyone's saying this year's GE was a watershed election. In my opinion, it isn't. It's just the start of things to come and if you ask me, I think it's the next election, or the one after, that will be considered a watershed election. People in my generation and gen-Z, are becoming increasingly sympathetic towards the opposition, which upholds liberal ideals such as freedom of speech, freedom to love and they want to see the eradication of inequality as well as racism. Many of them aren't able to vote this time round, but just wait and see - it's the next election where we'll see a real difference. And if the ruling party doesn't do some serious soul-searching, it's in trouble. We may see a dual-party government in the near future.

That's all I'm going to say about the GE, especially all that I've witnessed this time - the divisiveness of politics. When friends share different political values, it could lead to heated arguments and to be honest, I'd rather stay out of it - unless, both parties are willing to speak civilly and calmly about issues. Then, that's a conversation. If not, I'd choose the friendship over winning an argument. I may be a coward, but at the end of the day, no one wins if politics ends up tearing people apart, tearing society apart.

This year's politics has also been particularly ugly with the various police reports and online petitions. To be fair, I'm not sure whether past elections were that ugly, since I haven't witnessed much elections, with GE2020 being my first as an adult (I was away in myanmar in 2015), and this being the FIRST true internet election. Nevertheless I must say, I'm left quite shakened. What I saw on twitter, sometimes facebook - people declaring their stand and shutting down others - was quite frightening. I was speaking to an analyst and she says it could be very unhealthy if society becomes dominated by factions. She went on to say that those who are on the middle ground, who are moderate, might recede in the background and won't feel free to express themselves. I couldn't help but agree.

There should be enough safe space for all to voice their political views and opinions. Ironic isn't it? If there are fewer restrictions on speech, the internet may get overcrowded with voices and the noise ends up silencing others in the process. This world, I will never fully understand - but it never ceases to amaze me (and sometimes amuse me).

With that said, onwards we trudge. To the next five years, and I hope more conversations sparked, and better understanding amongst Singaporeans. I honestly don't know if I'll still be a reporter and if I'll be bringing the news to you in the next election. One thing's for sure, I'll be exercising my right to vote - for the second time in my life. It was quite thrilling voting for the first time this year hahaha. Such a noob.

I leave you with this beautiful sunset I witnessed at Pasir Ris Park last week -

majulah singapura~